1) The move to Melbourne

God didn’t say “Chris and Christine, move to Melbourne, NOW!” It was a bit more like  Abraham’s journey – leave your country, and go to the place I will show you. We felt like our season in Adelaide was coming to completion, while it had been a tremendous experience and growth for the both of us, we both felt in our spirits that it was time for a change, we were ready for a change. We prayed about it as we applied for internship. One day, God challenged us to ‘want something impossible’. Hence, Melbourne, and St Vincent’s came about, and God did the impossible for us. The both of us. Here we are now, in His promise land for us this season.

2) Internship

I cannot believe I have 2 more weeks to go to the end of internship! A steep learning curve it’s been for me. I still remember freaking out when I found out I was scheduled to work on the afternoon of the 3rd day of orientation! Freaking out before I started my first night shift. Freaking out when I call consultants/registrars to make referrals. LOL. I don’t know about you, but studying for exams is definitely a lot easier than being responsible over someone’s life.

Over the months, I have grown to be comfortable with my job, be more confident in the things that I do, learn how to ask for help, because there is always someone whom you can speak to, and just enjoy the process (instead of stressing out all the time!). My sanity was kept, knowing that my mind, my ability and my hands may be limited, but knowing that God was with me, and guiding me every step of the way, above all – is in control. I am constantly reminded of the privilege I have to be in contact with people, to care, to pray and to treat them as I would my own family.

Looking forward to 2011! I have not yet decide on what I plan to specialise in but am excited about doing the Surgical job – God has been gracious once again, I am really pleased with my roster and could not have asked for more.

3) Planetshakers

Church, what can I say? It has been amazing. While we haven’t been ‘actively serving’ due to our schedule and time constraints, we are so blessed to be a part of this inspiring church, a vision so big (you know it’s God) that our spirits agree with, and just being constantly fed, nourished and refreshed by His presence and the amazing atmosphere at church. Our urbies are like family and we couldn’t be more thankful!

4) iPhone

Yes, definitely worth noting down. How has it changed the way we communicate! I don’t care what anti-apple people say, you’d have to agree that the iPhone IS a revolution in itself.

5) Graduation

Yes, 4 months into working AND THEN we had our graduation ceremony. Why was it significant? 5.5 years in med school!! Also, it’s the first time our parents meet

6) Bestie’s wedding

Sooo honoured to be a part of Jing & Li’s wedding. It was beautiful Have I mentioned? I love weddings!

7) DNA Encounter

If I had to choose a day, this would probably be the most significant day of 2010. It was the final day of our DNA series, and it was about starting anew. Shredding our past (including things that you didn’t think would affect you but inadvertently carry), we walked out of that place in such freedom, it was just amazing.

Engagement

You’d be surprised that DNA Encounter was more significant than this day, but I know Chris would agree with me. This would be the 2nd most significant event of 2010. Y’know, it was the weekend leading up to his birthday. Did not cross my mind that he would propose (I don’t sit around thinking he would propose every weekend). I had planned a birthday surprise for him (ie. we were going to surprise each other!!!!) on Saturday (which was his initial plan) but I had turned him down saying that I had a prior lunch appointment with a girlfriend (which was true!!!!) of course, then planning to prepare for the surprise thereafter. He was pretty disappointed, and I was a bit ?? as to why he was reacting that way (of course now I know). So my surprise party for him went pretty well, except I fell sick.

Anyway, the next day (Sunday) he asked me out to dinner – asked me to dress up etc. Because I was so sick, I did not even suspect a thing but went along with his plan thinking it was an early birthday dinner (although I already told him I was planning dinner for him on the actual day itself). So we had dinner, and chatted as usual. Post dinner took a drive around Williamstown and finally stopped at a look out point, all this while (romantic music playing in the background – which I was oblivious to cos he initially recorded the planetshakers demo cd into it and told me there were extra slots so he put in a few other ‘random songs’ as well) just chatting and looking out into the docks.

He then said he had something for me, and passed me a padlock (background: we went to europe for our grad trip and one of the places that we visited was florence. there was this grille thing along the river where couples would write a message on the padlock and lock it to the grille). he said we should go back to florence. i was like, okayyyyy sure. i love florence. btw, where’s the key? you can imagine the look on his face -_-” (he meant it to be romantic, but super fail response from me lol)

Anyway we continue chatting (by the way, it was really cold and windy outside hence we stayed in the car), and we were talking about how the year has been etc.. when he said, he is ready for a new chapter. at this stage, asked me to close my eyes, cos he has something for me (i thought it was the key! does this remind you of a mr bean scene?!). he places a box in my hand. he gets out of the car and goes down on one knee. i open my eyes to a little blue box tied up in white ribbon. i start to tear (as all girls do). and the rest is history.

And, my dream of becoming a bride is soon becoming reality! Hehe More importantly, a bride to my best friend, the one my heart loves, a man after God’s heart.

9) Ben & Jerry’s

i had my double scoop of chunky monkey and strawberry cheesecake on boxing day. bliss!

why on earth do I have Ben & Jerry’s on this list?! because it is significant ok. i cannot describe how much i love Ben & Jerry’s. when I found out they don’t have one in Melbourne, I vowed to buy their franchise. (just like I did with boost, krispy kremes, max brenner to malaysia – but guess what, someone beat me to it! it’s ok i still have hope for cibo and koko black)

p/s: you know that my year in status programmed that everyone was using on facebook? exactly 2 weeks before it became available, i had actually thought of collaging my statuses for the year (i kept refreshing older posts, up till jan2010 – till the cows came home) too bad i’m not some software programmer, otherwise, i would be the creator of my year in status! lol

p/p/s: similarly with mini cupcakes. i thought of it too (before it was made popular)

there. just thought i’d say it. lol.

Can I say, 2010 would not have been possible without the resilient spirit that God had given me. His amazing grace and favour over my life, our lives, my family’s life – was without works. There was no striving. Just full dependence. Believing for an even greater, supernatural 2011.

Blessed new year!! Have a grand one.

This year I was especially overwhelmed by the wishes and the kind thoughts that I got. Maybe more so because I didn’t seem to think much of it, yet people remembered, and spoke words of encouragement into my life. Thank you papa and mummy for the heartwarming message. Thank you dear for the surprise when I got home from work. Thank you Wen Hao for bringing Chris and I out for dinner. Thank you Wei Lin and Jia Wei for the cake.

Most of all, thank you Jesus for journeying life with me, all throughout this 25 years. Thank you for loving me and calling me Your own.

More than growing in age, I want to grow in wisdom and in stature, and in favor with You God and with men.

The ‘Night’ Life? No, I don’t mean party-ing to the wee hours of the morning.. It actually involves working right through the night! I forgot how much I hated nights (after all it was some 6 months ago since I did my last lot of night shifts). Yesterday literally swept me off my feet. I was totally unprepared for a full on night, with multiple MET calls and Code Blue. What’s more, I am covering a resident job (all the specialty medicine *jaw drop*). Pretty depressing to say the least. Am thankful however that my other colleagues on nights were a great bunch to work with

Went home feeling crappy and seriously reconsidered my career in medicine (nb. I have silly thoughts and make silly decisions when I am sleep deprived). LOL! Said a quick prayer, and banished all those silly demoralising thoughts, and take them captive. Shortly, I was off to snoozeland before I could even say AMEN. Woken up 6 hours later by Chris who said he’ll make me a quick meal fix before heading to church. At that point, I probably had a GCS of 5, with mumbles and groanings that no one can understand, and the thought of not going to church seemed ‘wise’ at that time (see I told you I make silly decisions when I’m sleep deprived!).

Cut the long story short, I finally mustered enough energy to get up and go to church. On the way, it was POURING! To top it off, I had pretty severe colicky abdominal pain, and I was thinking to myself, is it even worth going to church in this state (especially since we were already 15-20 minutes late)? You know what. We still went. And you know what? BEST decision ever! Church, once again, was AWESOME! That’s just putting it mildly. I can’t describe how thankful I am to be a part of Planetshakers, a church that has such a big heart and big vision, and big revelation of who Jesus is. Every Sunday, I leave church encouraged, rejuvenated and just PUMPED! I have no doubt that God brought us to Melbourne not only for work, but to connect us to this amazing family called Planetshakers.

Left church with 3 things:

1) painfree!!

2) after my traumatising night yesterday, my confidence was pretty affected. and I realized how fearful I was when confronted with impending death. It was crazy to say the least. I don’t have problems with death, I do have problems with dying though.. and I also noticed that when I became fearful and tense up, I don’t know what to do! I didn’t even think of praying. Ps Matt spoke today about how when you become fearFULL, then you become faithLESS. How true! and God reminded me to pray before I enter the room to review the patient, pray before going in for the MET call/code blue. He also gave me this brilliant idea, when we eventually set up a Christian based hospital in the future, when a MET call/code blue is activated, we also activate a prayer and intercessory team. How awesome is that?

3) totally recharged for work tonight

While tonight was no less busy than yesterday night (well I was working non stop for the past 5.5 hours, I finally got a break and felt the need to write all of this down, lest I forget and before I get paged agaiN!!), I felt at peace. When the Spirit of the Lord is upon me, there is wisdom!  I was able to work through my list of jobs, and managed the patients well, without getting flustered.

And I thank God for sending little angels to remind me why I do what I do. On the way to work, I met one of my patient’s son. He thanked me and said that he would remember me well (well, you know how most ang mohs think all Asians look alike), I looked after his mom some 10 weeks ago. His mom presented with chest pain, but eventually had a stroke which had been overlooked initially cos it presented atypically. I saw her with a lateral gaze and felt something within my spirit that it wasn’t right and did a neuro exam on her, which was consistent with a stroke. I thank God for that nudge, otherwise she would’ve not make it. I explained that it was my duty and he didn’t have to thank me for it. I thank God so so much for this platform to be able to touch lives, and I don’t ever want to grow numb to His voice, or His nudge, because He is the giver of life, and I want people to experience this life through His touch. So yes, I still want to be a doctor. Am not reconsidering my career in medicine at this stage. LOL.

Well, to sum it up, I still HATE nights and the thing it does to my sleeping patterns and lonely lifestyle. But it ain’t all that bad. Have a blessed week peeps!

You are favoured, and you are blessed because of His finished work on the cross. Never, ever, forget that.

It’s not just about doing the right thing.

It’s about a dynamic relationship with a God that should’ve been, would’ve been unreachable if not for His great love for us, that He would send His Son to die for us, so that we may have life. And even after He had died, and rose up from the dead, and ascended to Heaven (giving us eternal life if we accept Him), He did not leave us with just some spiritual notes/how-to guides on Christianity. He gave us the Holy Spirit, to be a friend, a comforter, advisor and basically everything that we need.

I’m sure all of these, you know, and you would’ve heard 1001 times!

The difference is, it’s personal. He has changed my life, and will continue to change my life.

It’s easy to say things that sounds logical, practical, and at times humble even.

For example now, it’s a season when we all have to start applying for jobs for next year (yet again!) booyah. And well, while it’s easy for some, who have already decided what they want to do to say, yes, I’m going down the Physicians/Surgical/Critical Care path and hence apply for the relevant job. For myself, I haven’t quite decided for sure what I want to specialise in, and would like to do a mixed year. Pros? I get to have more experience in other jobs, and build up my foundation, and it also gives me more time to think and to be sure about what I want to specialize in, in the future. Cons? Usually, all the good rotations are taken up, for good reasons too, cos if you’re already sure about what you want to do, then chances are you’d be allocated these jobs. (Am I making sense?)

My stock standard answer when asked would be, yeah I’m planning to apply for a mixed year, and in an ‘ideal world’, I’d like to have these rotations (highly competitive jobs, given the fact that I haven’t even decided what I want to do… yet). Wishful thinking!

And this familiar still, small voice in my head says, “Why not? I specialise in the impossible remember?”

Brings me back to 12 months ago when Chris and I were applying for our internship. Remember? He says. Remember how I performed that miracle and brought you into the promise land? The story of Joshua resounds in my head. This is Canaan, the land flowing with milk and honey. Every ground you tread on is yours.

I’m pumped! I’m gonna take ground. One by one. Believing that ALL things are POSSIBLE!

Apart from it having a nice tune, I think God is trying to catch my attention. And yes, I only realize it at the 197234926th time. If I sing so freely, You are God.. Do I mean it as often as I sing it?

In times when everything looks bleak, am I singing You are God?

- The God of the impossible?

- The God that is in control?

In times when I feel tired and weary, am I singing You are God?

- The God who refreshes?

- The God who renews my strength?

In times when men’s opinion determines my ‘mood’ for the day, am I singing You are God?

- The God whose thoughts, ways and plans are higher than mine or that of anyone else?

Such a humbling thought. Yes God, I want to sing You are God and mean it. Because there is only one reason for my existence – to live for You.

Here I am now, almost done with my first rotation of the year. Most days, I enjoy my time at work. Most of my colleagues and patients have been lovely, and it always makes me feel bad when they thank me after I’ve jabbed them a couple of times -_-” Of course, these include days when your pager goes off non-stop (and I used to think holding a pager was COOL), you feel like throwing it against the wall (but knowing how hardy these little twits are, they’ll probably continue ringing anyway). Or days when you are so busy that you don’t even remember when was the last time you had something to eat or drink. On other days, you would have to deal with patients who are really sick, patients who die, or patients who are just so confused – either way, it’s really sad.

Today is one of those sad days. I guess it affected me much more because I had just seen him a few hours ago and he seemed fine. I suppose life’s fragile that way. Staring at the lifeless body, I almost choked in tears.

I suppose it doesn’t help that I’m a bit of an emotional, sappy person. So I’ve definitely ruled out Psychiatry/Geriatrics/General Medicine. That’s also making me reconsider doing Paediatrics. It just demands too much emotionally – I very much prefer healthy kids.

Otherwise, it’s been a relatively quiet night, hopefully the rest of the night stays this way. It would also mark the last of my medical nights before heading back to Emergency for two weeks.

Have been on night shifts for the past 4 weeks which has been a good learning experience. Although I’m not liking the hours and the effect it has on my body/sleeping pattern/life in general. Or the lack of “life” (it’s pretty much been eat sleep work).

In church today, this thought just kept resounding in my head..

GOD, don’t live (life) without Him.

I’m sure many of us would’ve been asked ‘What do you see?’ when shown the picture above? And many people will also tell you, how you see it (is the glass half empty? or half full?) is determined by how optimistic/pessimistic you are. May I propose something else?

Rather than accepting that the glass is half filled, we should envision it full, or even – overflowing! So what if you say the glass is half full/half empty when regardless of how you see it, or how you convince yourself to think positively, you are still admitting, professing, confirming that indeed there is only half a glass of water.

Similarly, with your environment, your workplace, your relationships with people, your life, even your ministry… I suppose it’s easier to just say, “it’s like that one lahh.. just look on the bright side lorr.. there are many other people worse off than me..” or, “yeah, what can I do? the situation is like that, how much can one person do to change?”

I say can. No, scratch that.. what I say is not important, God says CAN! He said in John 10: 10, I have come to give life, and life to the full. Not to the half, not to the mediocre, not to status quo. In fact in other translations He says abundantly, that’s MORE than full.

Luke 6:38

Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

You say, give what? Well, how you see your situation is what you will expect in return. If you are satisfied with a glass half full, then with that measure, it will be given to you. Similarly, if you see FULL and ABUNDANT, God will use that measure to you (I’m not talking about finances only, but in everything!).

My God is a God of more than enough. So don’t just settle for enough.

So.. what do you see?

A glass half full or a FULL and OVERFLOWING glass?

Have a blessed weekend!

(nb. no this is not my toilet series, I will get to that soon. It’s my ‘staring-at-my-drink-and-the-Lord-enlightens’ series)

Just came off 7 days of nights. It’s been a good experience, a bit more independent, a bit more relaxed, and MEGA team spirit (I think it’s everyone emphatising with everyone that we’re all working nights and have no life), lots of foodies, and just starting to feel more confident about handling patients (and radiologists). My body clock is definitely suffering the consequences though. And I’m doing 5 weeks of this! Must cherish the next few days off before I go back to night mode.

Just thinking about it the other day, having worked for 6 weeks, as I was giving in my tithes, I was so humbled, so humbled to the point I felt like crying, because who am I? That I have been so blessed and privileged to be able to study medicine (not only academically, but financially), and now drawing a decent salary (albeit many people saying Victoria pays pittens), of which I have God, and my parents to thank. So undeserving, but He has promised that He will be, and always will be the God of more than enough.

As I begin to settle down and get used to being a working adult, I shall find some time to revive this blog. I have ‘Christine’s Toilet Series’ coming up (lightbulb moments)! So stay tuned…

i woke up at 6.22am when chris called (we both slept through our alarms!!) when it hit me that i should very well be boarding my flight NOW (which was bound to leave at 6.30am). after a few minutes of “oh no!”, “how?”, “what shld i do now?”, and frantically searching for the next flight which costs at least $300. my thoughts were cluttered, i was panicking, it pretty much stayed that way for about 15-20minutes.

i finally calmed down. chris just sat me down (as in sat my mind down), and say think about it. what are the odds of both of us sleeping through our multiple alarms (note the keyword is both, cos i am so very capable of sleeping through mine)? it is probably God’s way of protecting us. we both pretty much had a long week. i was already not feeling too well. we could’ve been in an accident, something could’ve happened in that flight, or just simply, i could’ve fall sick, again!

but it didn’t keep me from feeling disappointed, i had everything planned out, gonna meet weilin, finally got our accomodation stuffs looking somewhat concrete, had all these plans to meet up with people, maybe even squeeze in some time for shopping, and most importantly “me time”. Just me & my book, me & my journal, while i wait for the overnight flight at the airport later at night..

but God reminded me of what’s important. it’s so like Him to always do that. to refocus. and it helps when i have a God-fearing boyfriend who gives me wise advice as well. refocus. so i refocused. i just thought about the place, how it’s actually quite pricey. unfurnished. and there was another option that popped up which was a cheaper and more convenient alternative, but without confirmation. yesterday, i didnt care, yesterday i just wanted a place to stay, yesterday i was desperate. but today, God reminded me of what i initially prayed for. it has to be a home, it has to be safe, a place where people come and be blessed, it has to be a place that both weilin and i are comfortable and at peace with, it has to be the ONE that God had prepared for us.

i called wei lin, to “break” the news to her. we had a good chat. and we agreed that there was no point rushing it. i could’ve still catch the later flight to go straight for the contract signing without inspecting the place beforehand, but it didn’t seem right. so i called up the property manager, and told her what had happened. i expected the “cold shoulder” for not turning up, for missing the appointment, but she was really nice about it, which was a pleasant surprise. i withdrew from our application. the strange thing was, i didnt feel disappointed or sad. i felt peace. if this apartment was meant to be ours, it will still be in 1 weeks time, when i actually move down to Melb. so. yea.

what an eventful morning! but in all things, i choose to praise Him, for the One who knows, and who directs. i trust that He is more concerned about my accommodation than i am.

so yea, i may be $200 poorer (if i did go to melb i’d probably be a lot poorer from all the ‘shopping’), haha.. but i am so glad i serve a God who knows what He is doing.

you’ll probably see me adding to the list as i go on with this “operasi packing”!

1) i’ve got EIGHT (yes different colours of hangers of different shapes and sizes. no wonder my wardrobe looks “messy”

2) while packing, i came up with a list of 8 people i can think of, whose stuffs i still have with me because i always forget to give it back to them. if you’re one of them reading this, i’m sorry!!!! i will return them to you by this week. promise! *scouts honor* and pls pls don’t be angry k? and probably a whole heap of my stuffs are with other people too. if there’s anything i need improvement with, is in this area of keeping tab.

3) i just realize that i have to pack for 3 different places! because i’ll be going home, then to UK and then Melb.. all with different climates!!! what?!! so i can’t just chuck everything into bags and boxes and am DONE! i actually have to pick out my winter wear, from my summer wear, and some comfy wear to bring back home! anyway, to solve my “problem”, i’ve done something quite clever, if i do say so myself (haha), that is to create categories of boxes *pat myself on the back* except.. the problem is, my room looks like a MESS now with all those boxes lying around. *sigh*

4) i found some really UGLY clothes that made me wonder why i bought them in the first place, maybe cos they were cheap and on sale (note to self, don’t buy stuffs that you won’t wear, even if they cost $1!!!!). i’ve also packed away at least 2 bags of clothes and shoes that i want to give away, not because they’re crap, but either because they are too small, or too big (and again, note to self, don’t buy sizes that don’t fit you even if they were on 70% discount!!!!). also, i found that my favourite shirt and skirt has a hole in each of them sigh. which makes me feel so poor, especially when i attempted to sew them together, and they end up looking like patchwork! i REALLY need to practice my sewing skills.

so that’s my packing saga so far. stay tuned for more updates.

anyway, while moving on, and moving to melbourne and what God has in store is exciting, the reality of moving and finding a place to settle down and all that jazz is pretty daunting. i just want the whole process to be a smooth transition, so that i’ll start work in peace! while it’s probably natural to worry, phil 4:6-7 says be anxious for nothing! but in prayer and thanksgiving present my request to Him who is able to grant me the peace that transcends all understanding and reason. and I THANK GOD  for where He has placed us, and I ASK that He will favour and direct the path that we take as we step by step get our visa, medical registration, special leave, and accomodation done in preparation for the start of our careers as doctors!

count down. 7 weeks!